[‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎USER]

I need help friends. I feel like no matter how much I try, I keep coming across financial setbacks. We’ve been working really hard to make headway and get all of our debt paid off.

We take home about 90k between 2 businesses and 2 part time jobs and a full time job.

We hustle and work constantly. We have 4 kids. 1 in college, 2 teenagers and 1 elementary school kiddo. 2 in public school, 1 homeschooled.

2 with autism. So far in 2025, we had a $3800 tax bill over what we had set aside to pay taxes (we made more in the businesses than we anticipated), our water softener broke $2,000) my autistic teen needs 2 root canals and a tooth pulled ($3,000), and debt that needs to be paid off.

Our emergency fund was depleted from issues like this in 2024. We don’t spend beyond our means.

Our mortgage is 20% of our take home and we have no car loans ( and 2 cars on their last legs).

We do pay about $1,000 in credit card minimum payments that we are trying to get paid off, but we’re working on getting the above things paid off now.

How do I get out of this rat race?!? My current business is as a tutor and I make about $60k as 1099 doing that.

My other part time job is working for the curriculum company that I use to tutor with.

I don’t make much from this job but it’s an extra $400 or so a month.

My husband is working a full time job Friday-Sunday and a part time job Mon-Weds. He also runs a vending company. He can’t seem to find a job making more than $25/hr.

We also pay $1200/mo in health insurance so after that and 401k contributions to get the match, his paychecks are dismal at best.

He has severe dyslexia so any job with tons of reading or needing to pass a certification test, he cant pass.

He can do the job, he’s one of those Jack of all trades kind of guys, but if he has to get certified, forget it!

I have a masters degree in counseling but I make more doing what I do than doing therapy while not licensed.

So I can’t take the step back to do the 2 years to get certified. I’ve thought about teaching but I make more than teachers do in our area too.

I’m so open to ideas. Please help!

[Aimee]

Have you looked into state health care for at least the kids? You may qualify for lower cost/better insurance.

Of course, that depends on where you live.

In Pennsylvania we have CHIP which is a great program.

[Rahmah]

You have the entrepreneurial mindset and experience doing therapy. I would open a coaching business.

Low cost of entry and you can make six figures.

[Jennifer]

There are companies that make exams accessible to those who need that. Has he looked into that? I work for one of them reading exams to people with issues like his.

I never know the reason they need assistance.

I just read the exam to them out loud.

Maybe some help like this can get him into a field that takes licensing?

[Rick]

Agree with Recommendations above to use YNAB.
Total guess so I may be wrong but it seems you likely have 1) one or multiple spending leaks and 2) no or inefficient sinking funds.

Spending leaks – yes, some people struggle because of the big items like a crushing mortgage.

But it is far more common that people struggling have a reasonable mortgage yet fall to death by a thousand cuts in all the other expenses.

It is super super rare that someone with challenges you describe after using YNAB doesn’t find hundreds of dollars monthly and is shocked there is still more money to be found.

Insufficient sinking funds – what you described are expected unexpected expenses. Any one person has 2-4 unexpected expenses a year.

A family of four has more like 6-8 unexpected expenses a year. And that makes them expected unexpected expenses. And they can be estimated or ball parked and that means they can be a line item in your budget.

A bucket of money prepared in advance, a little each paycheck, that covers these things.

And those two things above lead to credit card balances. And the cycle of pay down then charge up. And the feeling of the rat race.

This is both tough and so often fixable.

Just not how you have been doing it. Get YNAB. Get serious with it.

You can do this!

[Stef]

That’s not very much income for a family of 5 (I’m not counting your oldest- likely an adult) in 2025.

If you haven’t already, I’d apply for assistance on every bill your family pays.

Also consider using food banks or similar programs.

You may be able to do all of this online to apply and verify income qualification.

[Sam]

You’ve just gotta figure out how to make more money. 90k for as much as it sounds like you two are working isn’t enough.

If your husband is a hands on skills type of guy but struggles with dyslexia there are lots of skilled trades such as welding where he could make a ton at if he’s able to get the training, and employers are begging for skilled people who are willing to get the training and do the work.

Realize it’s easier said than done because it’s sort of taking a step back in order to take 2 forward later… but that’s what investment is

[Steve]

Dyslexia is recognized as a disability by the ADA. If there’s a particular trade your husband is interested in, schools (including trade schools and exam proctors) are supposed to provide extra accommodations.

[Irina]

Are you sure you make more in your business than what the teachers make in your area when counting all the costs?

You have to take into account the difference in taxes and in health insurance premiums.

I’m not sure what your deductions are for the business, but if not significant, I’d say that you would have a better end result with the teacher job.

[Wendy]

Ugh. It sounds like you are doing the best you can. Keep pushing to pay off debt, as when that happens you will have a little more breathing room.

Give yourselves grace for doing your best, staying positive and taking steps forward (dancing, two steps forward, one step back).

Look forward a decade and what will be different?

Kids through school and working or on their own, you’ll have the debt paid off (maybe still a mortgage, but…) and maybe progress.

Community colleges often have resources to help dyslexic or autistic students succeed – maybe look into certifications offered through community college?

Best of luck. Keep up the good work.

[Castle]

Hubbie is dyslexic and not a native English speaker and he started working in finance. Chat gpt writes his emails.

He’s been climbing through the ranks for a few years now and makes $120k in a remote role 6 years out of college.

Your husband needs to figure out how to earn more. 6 people on 90k is tough.

Sorry you are going through this.

[Holly]

I feel like it’s so hard for people to get ahead right now…everything is so expensive.

Do you have any big ticket items you could sell to raise funds for debt repayment?

Wishing you the best.

[Amy]

Sounds like you’re doing so many things right, it’s just you’re facing a significant “mountain” on your journey.

Have you tried a forecast budget to help you see the light at the end of the tunnel and figure out an end date for some of these things you’re tackling?

[Julia]

When looking for a regular job I also see postings for $18-20/hr. However, when I go on TaskRabbit most handyman services start from $35/hr.

Perhaps that’s something to consider?

When I needed to renovate the kitchen the demolition alone I was quoted at $2000 by a handyman.

[Mia]

You’re doing the most! The only thing out of order is retirement contributions to investments that will maybe make 10% while you are in debt paying interest at MUCH more than 10%.

I’d stop any 401k contributions for 24 months and put that plus ANYTHING else you can squeeze from the budget into paying off that cc debt.

You would truly be able to breathe if that were gone! How much would the 401k contributions free up monthly?

Also is there any chance you can find a W2 job paying the same or more as you’re making now that provides health insurance?

You’re clearly highly educated and skilled. Educational admin? Corporate trainer or employee development program manager?

L&D roles in tech started at $125k
As far as certs – download the free Gemini Google AI app and he can verbally ask it to give him the materials, prep study guides, etc.

You can even upload specific PDFs to it. Ask it to create entertaining podcasts to teach the material and include verbal pop quizzes between every chapter.

Then find out what kind if disability accommodation he can get for taking the actual test. He sounds like a really capable guy.

Rooting for y’all.

[Ellen]

You are going to think this is a ridiculous suggestion because it seems kinda expensive…

YNAB (You Need A Budget) is an envelope budget/planning system that transformed my relationship with money.

If I’d discovered it 15 or 20 years ago my financial life would have been wildly better.

They have a YouTube channel that’s free. You can binge watch their educational videos without paying a dime.

Learn their method! After immersing yourself in their method, do their 34 day free trial (it really is free, you don’t have to give them a credit card or anything to try it!).

Just by working out a proper budget you’ll learn a tremendous amount about your spending habits and your emotional relationship with money. I found it transformative.

I saved so much money during the free trial I had no problem shelling out the annual fee, and honestly, it paid the equivalent of the fee for like 10 years, LoL.

On my honor, I have no financial interest in YNAB. It just helped me so much I’m forever in their debt (but nobody else’s, they helped me take care of that!).

Many YNAB users also use UnDebtIt to figure out how to pay off consumer debt like credit cards and improve their financial footing.

If you had that $1000 that’s going towards minimum payments doing something more productive, you’d be in great shape.

Congratulations on identifying the problem and having the courage to ask for suggestions.

Good luck!!!

[Author]

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