[USER]

I would like life advise. Each of you have different life experiences and perspectives. I apologize this might be long and all over the place. I have been STRESSED the last few days thinking if I should get a higher paying job.

I make around 51k a year before taxes. I am married so we have two incomes. I have been stressed about this and I can’t exactly pin point it.

We are doing well. I really like my job. I left a very toxic job environment that put me in a dark place to a work from home job.

I love working by myself at home. My team is great, we get along well and my supervisor loves me and appreciates my work.

She actually gave me a 50 dollar gift card last week just because she appreciates me.

The work isn’t too stressful which is nice. I did take a pay cut to work here but it was worth it at the time because I was able to leave the toxic environment and slowly but surely get myself healthy both mentally, physically and spiritually.

The hours are great also. I work less hours than my previous job. I have more time and energy for my family and friends. This job also allows for flexibility.

For example i am leaving at 2 for an appt. My other job would make you feell bad for having to leave early.

Many pros but the pay. I do wish I got paid more but like I said we are doing fine.

I think about it and ask myself why do I want more money? Savings comes to mind but I’m already able to put some money in savings every paycheck along with my husband.

I already contribute 6% to retirement which I do want to increase actually.

I tell myself do I want more spending money? Sometimes I do but then I ask myself do I actually want more stuff cluttering my house or things I won’t use?

I guess I see of people always buying stuff like at Aldis for example and think I want to do that too but in reality I don’t need any of that stuff and I’m not gonna use it.

I ask myself more money to buy clothes? I already have clothes.

I ask more money going out to eat? But I’m on a health journey and going out to eat is so much more carbs, oil, butter, fat, etc than cooking at home.

It can retail your health progress. We are debt free. We have a home thankfully so no saving up for that. Cars are fine. WHY do I feel like this??

I guess sometimes i do feel tired being on a budget but even if i made more money i still need to be responsible and on a budget. I am still going to be frugal and a minimalist.

I do worry about getting a higher paying job and risking going back to a toxic work environment.

I have trauma about it. I’ve been at this current job two and a half years and it has taken this long to finally feel like I have healed and have the time and energy to take care of myself.

I know there are people here who are frugal to be able to give them flexibility in choosing jobs.

Any advise. Thank you

[Tammi]

Perhaps you would want to think of experiences such as trips as something to “spend” on and a reason to save. Also, do you have a good emergency fund?

Can you afford to replace your roof if needed? Major medical?

etc…..Many would be thrilled to have a 50k stay at home job……Maybe also think instead of “do I need stuff?”, think of donating a bit to a local food pantry or children’s group.

Even something as simple as paying off some kids’ lunch debts at your local schools. Lots of ways giving to others may be bring you joy.

All just ideas. It may just be the universe telling you to shift your mindset, not shift jobs :+)

[Beverly]

Trust me when I say more money is not everything. You are getting by well, you have a home, you are saving on gas, wear & tear on a vehicle, clothing, etc.

Do not, I repeat, not, compare your lifestyle to what others are doing. Someone could possibly be buying things at Aldi and be putting themselves deeper into debt.

Stay put and enjoy the flexibility, peace of mind, and decent salary you are enjoying with this job.

You’re doing good! All the best to you!

[Robin]

Stay. You are saving on gas, clothing, and lunches by working at home. It is OK to be happy.

[Patrice]

Sometimes we “grade” ourselves by our paycheck. If you can make it like you are. All is good. Just stash your cash and be happy.

It make take a bit to “get out” of that headspace. Maybe talk to a therapist/financial therapist.

They may help yoo

[Jude]

I left a high paying job and took a 40% pay cut so I could regain my sanity and mental health.

It was the right choice for me.

[Jennifer]

More money doesn’t always mean better. It sounds like you are still healing from the toxic work environment you left.

Over time our society has conditioned us to think we can only focus on our work, with absolutely no life balance, at the expense of our health, families, friendships.

I once worked at a company that expected us to respond to emails at all times of the day, including when on paid vacation.

At the end of the day, if something happens to you, you will be replaced. Yes, it’s important to do the work you have been hired to do and meet expectations.

Yet having an understanding boss willing to work with you and who values you is worth its weight in gold!!

I suggest talking with a professional, not your boss, to help you through this struggle within yourself.

[Nicole]

There is no harm in enjoying your current position while actively looking for something that pays better.

You have no need to rush and can take as long as you want looking at what is out there.

Maybe you stay at this job, maybe you find one just as good that pays more. No harm in looking.

You now have an example of what you DO want in a job vs what you DON’T want.

[Judi]

Sounds like you have more pros than cons. I have worked at many toxic companies and they all just seem to be getting worse.

I too took a cut in pay & so much happier. Rethink your process!

Good Luck!

[Cindy]

Stay where you are. I was in a high stress job and my family, especially my kids, suffered because of it.

If you’re happy, have a great work/life balance and are getting along well financially, I say stay put.

There is no substitute for your mental health and well being.

[Christine]

The benefits of a pleasant work environment, low stress, fewer hours are huge! You said you’re doing fine (financially) so that’s also huge.

Please, focus on the positives you’ve listed, hug your family, be grateful that you’ve healed & enjoy each day.

We raised three kids with one salary and were grateful to have so much time together as a family.

We aren’t debt free and we don’t have a second home, but our family is close and connected.

We choose to be content.

[Tina]

Stay where you are! That kind of support and environment is worth everything!

[Janice]

But are you saving money on food, gas, car expenses working from home. I’d keep doing what you are doing now.

[Linda]

Stay where you are! Not many are lucky enough to have a job like your current one.

[April]

I agree stay where you are it’s good for you and it sounds like you know exactly why you you are wanting more $ this shall pass for me just listening to the others in my office when they are talking and stressing over all the bills they have then the next day are in new clothes I just shake my head and say really dud you need that

[Rene]

Seek a professionals help. You sound very much like my daughter who has severe anxiety. You have answered the question, just seems loke you’re fighting a hudden battle elsewhere.

You seem like a strong person, don’t let life bring you to your knees! Best of luck.

[Nora]

No amount of money is worth the wear and tear on your mental health. If your bills are paid, and you enjoy your job and environment, stay there.

Find something to do on the weekends to make extra fun money if you still feel the need to contribute more.

Stock fruit at a grocery store on Saturdays or offer Friday night babysitting for your neighbors.

[Sheri]

The one thing I think about when I am buying anything is do I need it? If answer is no, I don’t buy. It’s simple. And I only am one person in household.

First thing I thought when I was paid is to have a set amount that I had to put towards savings.

No matter what then I would divide rest for bills.

And hope for the best lol. But that did work for me

[Cheryl]

I have seen too many friends and family bail from a great job to a higher paying job only for a few dollars, and ended up miserable.

If you are happy and overall can afford your needs and most wants, stay where you KNOW you are happy.

[Alan]

I believe you feel the way you do, because almost all of us were raised to constantly better ourselves and to that end earn more money.

I believe though that is a fallacy. As you have discovered, chasing the dollar does bring rewards, but it also brings a lot of the negative things you mention.

If you are at peace with yourself and your situation then there is no need to worry about changing/improving it.

[Venesser]

You already know what is best for you, so listen to your gut instinct.

Many years ago my dad left a very high paying job to take up a job that had less pressure, regular work hours and so on.

His new job paid about 1/3 of the old one. BUT mum was at the point of considering a divorce.

My dad was not the only one suffering. Yeah, things were tight and we struggled a bit, but we all adjusted.

It is human nature to want more than we have, to be able to splash out on those items we see others have.

It’s perfectly normal! You know that saying about the grass being greener on the other side of the fence.

If your job brings in enough money to support you, AND has all the benefits you need like working from home, flexible hours when needed etc then personally I say stick with it.

If you’ve not had a pay rise since starting maybe ask what the schedule is for reviewing and increasing pay rates to keep pace with inflation.

Asking for more money is not a conversation most of us like to have, but employers surely have to realise that you cannot be paid the same rate for 20 years, annual increases, if only a percent or 2 are necessary.

About 4 years ago now I quit a high paying job, sold my house and moved to a rural area.

I have a little money still from the house sale, but with purchasing a new property, renovations, maintenance etc there isn’t a whole lot left.

I was fortunate enough to pick up a couple of part time jobs in the area.

My bosses know each other and there is no problem with flexability if one job needs more time this week. The pay isn’t fabulous, but the bills are covered, and I love what I am doing.

At the end of the day I can honestly say I did something good that day.

I have a few small side hustles that bring in a little cash from time to time.

While I’ll never again earn what I was, the reduced stress, being appreciated for the work I do, and having control back over my life is so much more rewarding.

I won’t, and cannot, go back to a job that includes a minimum of 3hrs a day in the car, to then sit in an office like a machine being yelled at, and dismissed becaue I’m old and don’t know anything (I was 39 at the time, and apparently putting 2 spaces after a full stop is ‘just, like, sooooooooo annoying).

I used to love teaching, but the systems and processes around it, not to mention the managers who were not teachers, just turned it into a nightmare.

Now I am helping a small local business to gorw and expand, and on my other days I work at a community run community centre where I help people with anything they need help with.

One day I’ll be figuring out how to set up the lastest gadget, the next ringing around to find someone who can come out an fix a tyre for the mum of triplets down the road who can di it for herself, but boy she’s got a lot on and making a couple calls is really the least I can do to help.

Tomorrow I’ll be dropping off some books to an elderly lady who is on my may home. She’s not been well lately, and doesn’t get to see many people and I am bloody well greatful I’m in a position where I can drop her off a few of her favourite spy novels and sit down and have a cuppa and a chat.

Sorry, long reply. But it has a point. Money is necessary, and a little more to make things comfortable is always handy. Life is precious and you only get to do it once.

I wish I’d thrown that high paying job in a few years earlier. Mum and I had planned a big trip once I was eligible for long service leave.

There were places she wanted to see again with me, things she wanted us to do that she never got to do with her mum.

We never got there. I became eligible for long service leave 7 months after she passed away. And as I type I am waiting for a doctor’s appointment to find out if I have cancer too.

Live the life you want to live. Do the things that make you happy, that give your life purpose and meaning.

A new blender from Aldi is nice to have, but not a necessity. BUT if you really want one, jot down the price, divide it by however many times you get paid in a year and put those few dollars in a boot in your cupboard.

When Aldi have a blender on sale next year you’ll have the cash to buy it. My mum always had 3 bank accounts.

One for bills (everyhthing from electricity to car services), the second was for day to day necessities.

The 3rd one didn’t have a debit card, and was there for those times when you really needed a pick me up.

It may have been a girls lunch to our favourite waffle house, or that tour we came across on holiday that wasn’t in the trip budget, but were you ever going to have that opportunity?

Other times it’d be used to buy a dear friend a new blender because hers blew up, the car needed new tyres, one of the kids is sick and she was just having a crap month.

Do what makes you happy!

[Author]

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