[USER]

Going through divorce, married 20 years. I make 65k and he makes 165k+.

Trying to make it amicable but he doesn’t want to pay me any alimony. We live in Texas. Is it worth getting a lawyer to try to get alimony?

Thanks!

[Susanne]

You gave that man 20 years of your life, hire an attorney

[Luke]

Texas is generally non alimony state. If you can support your self then probably is an up hill battle to get it unless u are taking care an adult disabled kid.

Lawyer are expensive so need to find one that is honest about your particular situation.

[Paige]

ALWAYS get a lawyer. Don’t agree to ANYTHING. Run EVERYTHING through your lawyer.

Men take advantage of women wanting to keep things ‘amicable.’

[Lisa]

Get your spousal support. Get half of his retirement too. Don’t undersell yourself.

[Carolynn]

It’s not all about alimony. It’s about a financial settlement that is fair and legal in terms of assets, ownership, investments.

It won’t happen without a lawyer.

Instead of alimony, a financial settlement that recognizes the years married and what you are legally entitled to can be made with a lawyer representing you.

[Sandra]

One word: ABSOLUTELY.
Here are some more words: This isn’t simply about alimony.

It’s about an equitable settlement of assets.

[Jenifer]

Get an attorney. It’s not just the alimony, an attorney will make sure you get all that you’re entitled to.

[Lisa]

Actually consult w every attorney within 50-100 miles- bc then he won’t be able to;) and then hire the one you like best.

He owes you alimony and 1/2 of all retirement funds

[Courtney]

He can feel like not paying you all he wants. He can FEEL however he wants to.

It’s the Judge and the law that will FEEL otherwise.

Tell him to keep on enjoying those FEELINGS.

[Cara]

Texss doesn’t have alimony, however, you do need an attorney to ensure you are getting 1/2 of everything.

There is such a thing as contractual alimony, but I doubt you’ll be able to get it since you have a job and make money- it’s typically for SAHM who need time to go out and seek employment.

Make sure you ask about 401k, IRAs and other long term savings in addition to taxes should you need to take it out.

[Jessica]

Can you try to file on your own and then get attorney fees if needed? Some state law minimums allow alimony for X amount of years.
Best of luck to you!

My mom offered my dad less and he refused and ended up paying more + attorneys fees.

[Jonathan]

According to ChatGPT (needs to be verified):
Yes, Texas has spousal maintenance (commonly referred to as alimony in other states), but it is limited and only awarded under specific circumstances as outlined by Texas law.

Key Points About Spousal Maintenance in Texas:

1. Eligibility Requirements:
• The spouse seeking maintenance must lack sufficient property to provide for their minimum reasonable needs.

• Additionally, one of the following conditions must be met:
• The marriage lasted 10 years or more, and the requesting spouse cannot meet their reasonable needs due to a lack of earning ability.

• The paying spouse was convicted of or received deferred adjudication for family violence against the other spouse or their children within two years before the divorce filing or during the divorce process.

• The requesting spouse is disabled and unable to earn sufficient income.

• The requesting spouse is the caretaker of a disabled child (from the marriage) who requires substantial care, preventing the spouse from earning sufficient income.

2. Duration of Spousal Maintenance:
• Texas law sets time limits for spousal maintenance, depending on the circumstances:

• 5 years for marriages lasting 10–20 years or if family violence occurred.

• 7 years for marriages lasting 20–30 years.
• 10 years for marriages lasting 30+ years.

• If the spouse is disabled or caring for a disabled child, maintenance may continue as long as the condition persists.

3. Amount of Spousal Maintenance:
• The amount is capped at $5,000 per month or 20% of the paying spouse’s gross monthly income, whichever is less.

4. Modifications and Termination:
• Maintenance can be modified if circumstances change (e.g., income changes, remarriage).

• Payments terminate upon the death of either spouse or if the receiving spouse remarries or cohabitates with a romantic partner.

Texas law generally favors limited and temporary spousal maintenance, encouraging spouses to become financially independent after divorce.

If you’re considering spousal maintenance, consulting with a family law attorney can help clarify what applies to your situation.

[Rise]

You will not get alimony in Texas UNLESS you get an attorney. With an attorney, you may be able to. If your kids are still at home, it’s a good idea to get it until they leave.

If you stay in the family home, you’ll need it. Then, you can sell after they’re gone.

It’s worth it to try. I know women who’ve received alimony in Texas. Their husbands wanted that divorce. By state law, only a parent who has stayed home with a disabled child can automatically get it. You’ll need that attorney.

And make sure you get half of all assets, all investments, all savings accounts, all 401ks.

It doesn’t help anyone in America if you are left destitute because of divorce.

[Sharie]

Do you have kids or have something that stopped you from pursuing more income?

If not, I wouldn’t expect to get alimony

[Carrie]

Yes, Alimony unless he’s willing to give you a large lump sum to make up for the alimony. I have a family member who didn’t pay alimony but his wife got the house, which was 300k more than him.

They declared it fair as it would have been the equivalent to alimony for 6 years.

No matter what get your own lawyer or mediator so that you can make sure all your I’s are dotted and t’s crossed properly.

[Cori]

Yes, 1000%. You can still be amicable and use attorneys. But I’ve never seen a divorce settle fairly when lawyers AREN’T involved.

It’s usually one party getting the shaft, and usually it’s the woman.

Don’t let him do that to you!

[Grace]

Hire a lawyer. You are likely legally entitled to more than you realize. Alimony is only one potential part of a divorce settlement.

It will take into account the income disparity.

[Susan]

Definitely get a lawyer.
Texas doesn’t have guaranteed alimony but with your income difference and years married I’d think you would get some.

Good luck.

[Ashley]

Yes. You are also entitled to marital assets, including a portion of investments.

Don’t let emotion cloud your judgement right now.

[Cheryl]

It is always worth getting a lawyer. Especially in the state of Texas which is a 5050 state.

Very few manage an “amicable” separation of assets during a divorce.

Get a lawyer.

[Tracy]

There are lots of variables here. The reason for the divorce as an example. If you cheated (not saying that’s the case) should you be eligible for alimony?

Were you working your entire marriage with your own income, assets and investments and totally capable of supporting yourself?

Or were you a stay at home mom that sacrificed a career to be able to care for your children.

I personally am not a believer that one spouse should be entitled to alimony just because the other makes more money.

I feel it comes down to whether or not you can support yourself. But I am not a judge. So, the short answer is yes, get an attorney.

Having an attorney doesn’t mean it can’t be amicable.

[Sunriver]

Absolutely! Make sure the attorney is a good one. Unfortunately just because their name has credentialing letters after it doesn’t mean they are any good for you.

Interview a few before selecting one.

Doesn’t matter if wife or husband earned more, the amount is more than doubled and significantly can change one’s lifestyle.

You are worth every penny darling!

[Mark]

Before you cash out why don’t you seek some marriage counseling. Maybe you can save the marriage. Not sure if you have kids which would make things even harder.

The amount of posters on here that want to lawyer up immediately is incredible.

[Michelle]

Coming from a household that has paid out exorbitant amounts of alimony for past marriages: yes, get an attorney. Marriage is a contract and when it ends you should be dividing assets accumulated during the marriage equitably.

And if the law provides for alimony for a set amount of time, you should get that too and use it wisely. You both have futures to rebuild for.

I don’t believe in one adult profiting from a relationship but I don’t believe that ending a relationship should render anyone destitute either.

Use it to build a cushion while you up skill and get back on your feet.

Don’t let any of the bitter folks on this thread make you feel bad for taking care yourself. I wish you both the best.

[Grant]

Eligibility for alimony in TX:
The spouse is unable to earn enough income to support themselves
The spouse has custody of a child with a disability

The spouse has been married for at least 10 years
There is evidence of domestic violence

There is a significant wage disparity between the spouses

[Author]

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